


You Brought Me Your Bullets

by partyghoul



Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-14
Updated: 2013-03-13
Packaged: 2017-11-21 02:11:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 12
Words: 13,463
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/592299
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/partyghoul/pseuds/partyghoul
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Gerard is sent off to war, Mikey's true feelings for Frank come to light.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Never Coming Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And you're walking away, and I will die in this place.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This Week's Chapter Is Based On The Song- "Kill All Your Friends" by My Chemical Romance
> 
> Credit to MikeyFudgingWay (tumblr) for writing the fic (I only beta'd and added small parts)

Franks P.O.V

  
     And just like that, he was gone; with nothing but a bag in his hand filled with things to keep him sane at war. He looked so good in his uniform; I don't think I could ever imagine it dirty and blood stained.  
    I remember the day the man came to our door and asked for my love to go off to war. I remember that day the best; it's the brightest of my memories. Gerard and I were in th garden laughing, kissing, holding each other. It was the last time I was ever close to him before he was whisked off to the battlefield. I remember it so well because it was a cold October afternoon; the coldest I've ever experienced. It was my birthday. Gerard and I were to spend the day together; it was my only wish. Two weeks. That's all the man gave us until my life-line was supposed to be sent to the fronts of death.

* * *

2 Weeks later

    "No! Please! You can't take him! Please!" I cried. I was on my knees by the door, crying my eyes out as Madam Way and Michael stood beside me, a horse and carriage waiting in front, my lover looking down on me with a blank expression. He wouldn't look me in the eye, he couldn't bear it. I did all I could think. I stood up and grabbed his shoulders, begging him not to leave me. "Please, Gerard, look at me."  
    When I recieved no response, I kissed him one last time. He didn't kiss me back. He didn't even look at me.  
    Michael was trying to get me to release him, ignoring Madam Way's silent cries. I lost my grip eventually, and, without another word, my love turned and walked out the door.  
    Michael let go of me once Gerard was in the carriage. I took the opportunity and ran after him, but the horses started to run. I chased after them and soon fell to my knees, unable to keep up any longer. "No! Gerard! Please, you can't leave me! You can't! Please!" I yelled, wanting him to hear my pleads.  
    Michael ran up to me and fell to my side, wrapping me in his arms. "It's okay, Frank. You have to calm down. He'll be okay. Please, you're only making this harder on everyone."  
    "But I...I love him. He can't leave me," I choked, sobbing into Michael's shirt.

* * *

    Weeks have gone by and I've never once left my room, not even bothering to go out for meals. I keep my door unlocked until sunrise, thinking that maybe my love will come back in the dark of night. He never does. I lock up once I see the sun come up. I haven't wanted to see anyone. Michael must have noticed, though, because one night he came and my heart skipped a beat. I had thought it was Gerard. I thought he'd come back to me.  
    "You need to stop this. Whatever it is you're doing, Franklin, just quit while you're ahead."  
    "Don't call me that, please," I said, my voice low and rough.  
    "I'm sorry, but you need to start coming out of this room. You need to do something. Walk around the property, it's always helped to keep you sane." He moved around to the end of the bed, looking over my shoulder, trying to see the note I was writing to Gerard.  
    "But what if he comes-"  
    "Frank," Michael said sternly, moving closer to me. "Other people miss you. I miss you."  
    "Please, Michael, don't start."  
    Suddenly, he leaned in and kissed me. He kissed me the way only Gerard had. His mouth felt the same as Gerard's; the same shape and familiar warmth in them. I couldn't help but to kiss back. Soon, Michael was on top of me, our lips never parting. The note was discarded somewhere on the floor. It all felt too familiar, it felt almost wrong.  
    "I love you," is all Michael said before looking at me with sorrow written across his face. When I didn't respond, he hurried out of my room, leaving me alone yet again. I brought my hand to my lips, still feeling Michael's strong kiss.  
    That night I decided I would go to breakfast the next morning. I was left to fall into a worried, confused, and honestly, frightening slumber.

   

 


	2. You Can't Touch My Brother

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And you can't touch my brother and you can't keep my friends  
> and we're not working out, we're not working out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This Week's Chapter Is Based On The Song- "Honey, This Mirror Isn't Big Enough For The Two Of Us" by My Chemical Romance
> 
> Credit to MikeyFudgingWay (tumblr) for writing the fic (I only beta'd and added small parts)

I awoke the next morning feeling empty and tired. I was used to waking up alone by now. I sighed as I looked down at the bed, half of it vacant. I slowly got up and got dressed, questioning myself the entire time.  
'Maybe I should just go back to bed. No,' I told myself. 'I can't.'  
    When I finished dressing, I made my way down to the breakfast table. As I walked in to the room, I saw that Madam Way and Michael were already waiting. I sat down in my usual seat in front of Michael. "So, you finally decided to come and eat with us." Madam Way observed with a welcoming smile that made everything better for just a moment.  
    I smiled weakly and turned to Michael who was looking down at his plate a blank expression on his face. We ate in silence, the tension was so heavy I almost choked on it and I soon excused myself from the table.  I decided I would go to the gardens and visit the place where Gerard and I met.  
    The garden was in the heart of the property, covered by over grown vines that blocked almost the entire sky. I loved this place. It was just me and Gerard's . It's where we met, where we first kissed, and so many other memories I don't think I will ever forget.  
    There was a fountain in the middle of the garden. It used to be full of fish that Gerard and I would take care of, but now that he's gone, most of them are dead. I heard someone walking up to me and I turned to see Michael looking at me with a faint smile on his lips. "Frank, you left your room." Micheal said.  
"Yes. I suppose I did," I joked.  
    He walked up to me and gently wrapped his hand around the back of my neck, pulling me forward before putting his lips on mine. I melted into the kiss. It felt so much like Gerard that it hurt. Michael picked me up and set me on the edge of the fountain. The fountain was tall, so i had to bend down to reach Michael's mouth. I bit his bottom lip and opened my mouth slightly, giving him permission to do whatever he wanted. I soon felt Michael's tongue brush against mine. He was a strong kisser, his tongue massaging mine roughly as he claimed dominance.  
    I could feel myself starting to get hard, and I could tell Michael was way ahead of me by the way he kept rubbing against me. It felt so good and I couldn't help it when a soft moan escaped me. I felt him smile before breaking the kiss and looking at me for a moment. He looked like a child on Christmas day, running down the stairs to find that he had gotten everything he ever wanted.  
    His smile stretched across his face before he went down to my neck and began to suck on the sensitive skin. I let my head fall back in pleasure and I moaned his name. I could hear his breath hitch as I reached down and unzipped his pants. I quickly spit onto my hand and grabbed his cock, stroking it to full hardness before I felt Michael unzipping my pants and doing the same. Soon we were both panting into each other's mouths, finding a rhythm in our movements.  
    Just a minute later, Michael jerked his hips forward, fucking my hand as he came hard, with me following close behind. When we finished, we stayed in the same position for a few moments, not talking or moving, just struggling to catch our breath. He pulled back to look at me with a soft expression. "Frank," he whispered. I didn't say anything. I just looked to the ground beside us, holding back tears. Michael zipped his pants back up and gave me one more hopeful look before turning and walking away. I wished I had never left my room. Or...did I? I wasn't sure.

* * *

**1 Week later**  
    I went back to hiding myself away in my room, waiting for news on the war, but there was none. There was never any. I was at my desk one night, rewriting the letter that I could never get the courage to send to Gerard when I heard my door slowly open. I automatically knew who it was. "Michael," I said without turning to look.  
    "How did you know it was me?"  
    "Who else would it be at this time of night?"  
    He was silent for a moment before whispering, "Gerard," so quietly that I could barely hear him.  
    "What? Don't say that! Not after what you said to me! Not after what you did!"  
    "I know all you thought about was my brother. You weren't thinking about me at all."  
    "Because I love him. I'm weak. My heart aches for him and when...when you kissed me, it felt so much like him. I couldn't help myself."  
    "Well, you should have," Michael said, a touch of anger in his voice.  
    "How?"  
    "I don't know, Franklin!" Michael shouted, waving his arms around in frustration.  
    "Get out!"  
    "Frank," he said sternly, his eyes betraying his strong demeanor.  
    "I said to get out! And don't ever call me Franklin again!" I yelled, pointing at the door. I stared down at the floor. I didn't want to see him. Not now at least.  
    He stormed out of the room, filled with anger. I sighed and shut the door behind him. I told myself that I just needed to get some sleep and to clear my head, that everything would be figured out tomorrow.

  


* * *

    I was awoken by a servant early in the morning. I was told to be dressed and ready to meet travelers for breakfast. Once I was ready, I walked down the stairs and into the foyer to see Madam Way, Michael, and two men. One had very curly brown hair, it was quite enjoyable to look at. The other was taller and had broad shoulders. He had sandy blonde hair and eyes bluer than the clearest sea. After the traditional introductions, we were all set to have breakfast. I had learned that their names were Robert and Raymond.

 


	3. Waste Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hate me  
> Do it and do it again  
> Waste me  
> Rape me, my friend

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This Week's Chapter Is Based On The Song- "Rape Me" by Nirvana
> 
> Credit to MikeyFudgingWay (tumblr) for writing the fic (I only beta'd and added small parts)

Our meal was eaten in an uncomfortable silence. I could feel Robert burning holes into me with his stare. Michael never looked up from his plate and was silent the entire time. Madam Way and Raymond were talking about his travels; it was all very boring, to be honest. I sat there waiting until we were allowed to leave. I kept wondering what the day would be like. Madam Way had explained to me and Michael that the travelers were famous and had explored new parts of the world and how great an honor it was for them to be staying with us. I found it hard to get excited over the pair. She had also asked up to help the travelers with anything they needed. So, for the next week, Michael and I were to do everything and anything our guests asked. I ignored my duties and retired to my room as soon as I could get away. I wasn't in the mood to entertain some pompous travelers.

* * *

The next day, Robert asked me if we would walk around the property. I wondered how that would go. As I began making my way down the hills, I got an uneasy feeling about the whole situation. I kept thinking about how Robert looked at me the day before, but I quickly brushed it off, knowing that I had couldn't deny his request.  
    I walked outside and saw Robert waiting for me on a bench. He looked up as I started to walks towards him and I forced a smile. He stood up and smiled bak, motioning for me to follow him. We walked and chatted for hours. We talked about his travels, where he'd been, and who he'd met along the way. Surprisingly enough, I really enjoyed his company. When we departed, Robert asked me to see him in his room tomorrow. That night, I actually went to sleep with a clear vision of what the next day would bring.

  


* * *

I walked up to Robert's door and knocked lightly. I was nervous because I still didn't really know him. I decided to wash away my doubts when he opened the door. I stepped inside and saw maps spread out all over the room. Some were on the dresser, the floor, even on his bed.  
    "Mr. Bryar, these are amazing," I said in awe.  
    "Yes, they are pretty interesting, aren't they? They're all the places I've traveled to. And please don't call me Mr. Bryar; I feel old when people call me that."  
    "Where _haven't_ you been?" I asked, a hint of playfulness in my voice.  
    "I've been everywhere that's been discovered," he said with an accomplished smile.  
    I smiled back softly before asking about another map. We started looking through the map and spent most of the day talking about it. It was well after dinner time when we had finished looking through most of the maps. I walked ahead of him and went into his room. He followed closely behind, locking the door once we were both inside. I didn't think much of it as he guided me towards the middle of the room where there sat a fairly large map.  
    We sat down on the floor and started looking at the page. I was in front of it, sitting with my legs tucked underneath me; Robert was laying on his side, curled up behind me. He told me about all the people that lived on the island we were observing. He spoke about the rituals they practiced, the food they ate, and other customs. I was leaning down to read something when I felt Robert rise up and wrap his arms around my waist. I froze when he licked my neck before starting to suck on it. His grip was strong and I could barely squirm around, trying to break free. "Robert, what are you doing?" I asked, my voice shaken.  
    He told me to shut up as he reached down and jerked my pants open, breaking the front button. He pulled my pants and underwear down to my ankles, leaving me exposed. "Please stop," I begged. "Don't do th-" I was cut off by him rolling me onto my stomach.  
    My head hit the cold wooden floor with a loud thud. I couldn't breathe. All of my air was being pushed out of my lungs along with little gasps and pleads for him to stop. He positioned my arms over my head and held them there with one hand as he pushed my hips down. He nudged my legs apart with his knees, causing my face to fall against the floor. I gasped as he spit in the crevice of my ass. I heard him unzipping his pants and pushing them to the ground before stroking his dick. One of his hands still gripped my wrists with full strength.  
    Suddenly, I felt the tip of his cock enter me without any warning. As he slowly pushed inside, I could hear his grunts, but they were muted like I was under water. There was a ringing in my ears and I started to cry out in pain. I felt Robert move the hand that was on my hip to cover my mouth, pushing my head up so my chin was being crushed to the ground.  
    I looked up and saw the door. I was so close to everyone, but no one was coming to see what was happening. I was practically screaming out for help, but none came. It seemed like a life time before I felt Robert jerk and come inside me with one last, loud groan before pulling out of my and tugging his pants back on.  
    I fell to the ground with a jolt of weakness. Robert bent down and grabbed my face, his fingers pressing hard onto my skin. "If you tell anyone what just happened, I'll kill you and everyone you love. Even Gerard, if the bastard's not dead already," he sneered. I felt sick to my stomach at the mention of Gerard's name. "Now be a good boy and get out. I want to see you tomorrow afternoon. In here. No questions asked."  
    All I could think to do was nod and pull my pants up before walking out of the room, shaking and trying to hold back tears. I avoided everyone in the house and went to my room. I locked my door and fell onto my bed, pulling the sheets over my head and whispering to myself, "Gerard, please come back. Please...please. If only you were here, my love."  
    I didn't sleep at all the night in fear of the next day's events.


	4. Could I Lie Next To You?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And for the last night I lie.  
> Could I lie next to you?
> 
> Alright, give up, get down.  
> It's just the hardest part of living.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This Week's Chapter Is Based On The Song- "Rape Me" by Nirvana
> 
> Credit to MikeyFudgingWay (tumblr) for writing the fic (I only beta'd and added small parts)

I dreaded waking up the next morning because I knew I had to see Michael in all his fury, and, worst of all, Robert. That bastard. I knew I needed to talk to Michael, but I was scared that Robert would find out.  
    I slowly made my way down to the dining room and sat down at the table. I was the last one to sit before we said grace and dug in. Although I wasn't very hungry, I never really was, I noticed that Michael and Raymond were stealing glances and stupid smiles at each other very so often. I couldn't help but wonder what was up.  
    "How are you feeling, Frank?" Madam Way asked me in a solemn voice.  
    "I'm fine. Just haven't been getting much sleep lately."  
    "I can tell you miss my son," the old dame said, worry clear in her eyes.  
    "Deeply; more than my heart can take," I admitted.  
    "He'll be fine. You just have to keep the faith that inside your heart."  
    I nodded lightly, taking Madam Way's words into consciousness. I heard Robert snicker and I could feel his gaze on me. It sickened me and made me want to kill him. I went back to picking at my uneaten, and now cold, food. A few minutes passed before the meal was over. I was last to leave the table, being too lost in my thoughts to notice that everyone else had vacated their seats. Once I cleaned up, I decided that I was going to talk to Michael.  
    I made my way up to his room and opened the door, not caring to knock first. "Michael, I-Oh my God! I'm sorry! I didn't mean to intrude!" I said in shock. Ray was on top of Michael, kissing him, but soon moved to his side when I walked in. I turned around to leave, feeling very awkward about myself.  
    "Frank, wait!" Michael yelled after me. I didn't listen to him; I just hurried from the room and out of the house.  
    I was running through the maze of hedges when I lost my footing and toppled onto a bush. It was hollow, like a small dome of leaves and twigs with barely any daylight seeping through. I was breathing heavily as I tried to catch my breath. I slugged down until I was laying on the ground, my lack of sleep suddenly catching up with me. Before I knew it, I was drifting off into a reverie.

* * *

"Gerard, come on! You _know_ you can run faster than me!" I yelled, trying to catch Gerard as we ran around the estate.  
    "Oh, boo-hoo! If you want me, you'll have to catch me!" he shouted over his shoulder.  
    We were much younger. Barely in our teens.  
    "Fine! I don't even want you anyway," I said before stopping to fold my arms, sticking my tongue out at him in a childish manner. Gerard stopped, turned around, and started running towards me.  
    "Oh, _that's_ how you wanna play, then?" he joked. I started to run away, but I was no match for him.  
    "No! Don't chase me," I begged, but he had already grabbed my by my waist from behind, making me almost all forward. The only thing that kept me standing was his strong hold on me.  
    He squeezed me into a tight hug, nearly cutting off my air. "Don't worry, I've got you," he whispered into my ear.

* * *

 "Frank? Frank?" Michael was coaxing me out of my dream. "What are you doing in the bushes?"  
    I didn't get the chance to reply before he sighed and walked away, leaving me alone yet again. I waited until he was out of sight before getting up and going back into the mansion. The moon was out, so I must have slept the day away; that's probably why Michael was looking for me.  
    A sudden jolt of fear ran down my spine as I remembered that Robert had wanted me to visit him. Once I got inside, I walked up to the guest room where he was staying. There was on candlelight shining through the cracks in the door. I decided to go to Michael's room instead.  
    As I made my way down the hall, I saw Raymond turn into view and I slipped into a side hallyway to hide myself. I watched Raymond walk up to Michael's room before opening the door, walking in, and closing it behind him. I snuck up to the door to eavesdrop on what was going on. I could faintly hear the sound of Raymond's voice.  
    "Come and travel the world with Robert and me. Please," Raymond begged.  
    "No. I can't. My mother is still in mourning over my brother's abscence and-" Michael was cut off by Raymond saying my name.  
    The was a silence in the room before Michael emitted a quiet, "Yeah," under his breath. I heard the bed creak before footsteps became louder, coming towards the door. I hurried to the end of the hall before making my way back to Michael's room, acting like I hadn't heard what was just said.  
    I say Raymond walk out of the room and head my way. He was frowning as we walked past each other. He stopped and grabbed my arm to get my attention. "Look, you better take care of Michael. Do you ever stop to think how _he_ might feel about all this? He has a brother that's off to war and he needs someone to be there for him. Don't hurt him more than you already have."  
    He let go of my arm and quickly walked away, leaving me in a stunned silence. Once I regained my composure, I walked into Michael's room to find him sobbing on his bed with his knees to his chest. "Go away," he whispered.  
    "I'm sorry, Michael. I know you're hurting just as much as I am," I said quietly.  
    "You would think that I'd miss my brother just as much as you miss him! He's _my_ brother for Christ's sakes!" Michael shouted at me. We were silent for a while, both of us unsure of what to say next. Even when Michael was calmed, he still had tears in his eyes.  
    "He hurt me," I said, breaking the silence. Michael looked up at me with questioning eyes.  
    "What do you mean?" he asked as he got up from his bed and walked towards me.  
    "Robert. H-he raped me, Michael. Yesterday, after dinner. But you can't tell anyone because he said he would kill you, Madam Way, even G-Gerard," I chocked out, tears rushing to my eyes.  
    "Frank, I-I'm so sorry," he mumbled. He looked me in the eyes before pulling me into a tight hug. "I'll tell him to leave tomorrow."  
    "No, you can't! He'll know I told you. And what about Raymond? He likes you so much. You'll only end up hurting him too," I whispered, the last part of my sentence tinged with jealousy.  
    "You know I would never leave you," Michael cooed.  
    "Yes, I know that. But you still can't tell anyone," I pleaded, my words quieted against the fabric of his shirt.  
    "Fine. I won't tell anyone," he sighed. "Do you want to sleep in my bed tonight?" he asked, looking hopeful.  
    "I-yes, I'd like that," I muttered.  
    He broke the embrace and took my hand in his before pulling me onto his bed, both of us still in our day clothes. He pulled the cover over our bodies and wrapped me up in his arms before kissing my forehead gently. He whispered a faint, "goodnight," before drifting off to sleep. It felt nice to have someone lay next to me again, filling some of the emptiness Gerard had left.


	5. Just Look Into My Eyes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Any time at all  
> All you've gotta do is call and I'll be there.  
> If you need somebody to love, just look into my eyes, I'll  
> be there to make you feel right.  
> If you're feeling sorry and sad, I'd really sympathize.  
> Don't you be sad, just call me tonight.  
> Any time at all, any time at all, any time at all  
> All you've gotta do is call and I'll be there.  
> If the sun has faded away, I'll try to make it shine,  
> there is nothing I won't do  
> If you need a shoulder to cry on I hope it will be mine.  
> Call me tonight, and I'll come to you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This Week's Chapter Is Based On The Song- "Rape Me" by Nirvana
> 
> Credit to MikeyFudgingWay (tumblr) for writing the fic (I only beta'd and added small parts)

Morning came quick. Quicker than I wanted it to, but it was worth it when I looked up to find Michael watching me. He was laying on his side, his head resting on his hand, arm wrapped around me. I was curled up beside him, facing him. "Morning," I yawned before leaning up to kiss him. His mouth was warm and welcoming. I could feel him smile into the kiss as he leaned over me to get better access to my lips. We stayed together most of the morning, just laying in his bed and kissing, laughing at the childish jokes we were whispering to each other. We were in our own little world, just the two of us. I forgot about everything that had been happening and I smiled genuinely for the first time since I was with Gerard.  
    We were wrapped in the covers, laughing like fools, when there was a knock at the door. It was a servant telling us that the travelers were leaving early tomorrow to some newly discovered land. He also said that Madam Way asked us to help them pack. Knowing it would be their last day here, not that I really cared or anything; I wasn't worried about anything right now, but knowing it was Madam Way's request, I got out of bed and went to go help Raymond.  
    I asked Michael if he would help Robert because I was scared of what would happen if I went back into that man's room. Raymond and I didn't talk much, giving that Michael wouldn't go with him. After I was done, I retired back to my room. I fell on my bed, sighing heavily. The day was cloudy and there was a light rumble of thunder in the sky. It was peaceful. I felt my eyelids getting heavy and I soon drifted into unconsciousness.

  


* * *

"Stop! Please!" I gasped on the ground as some kids from school loomed over me, randomly kicking my side and spitting on my face.  
    "Why? So you can go cry to your mommy?" one kid taunted before kicking me in the ribs.  
    "He doesn't have a mommy. Only an old drunk for a father!" a taller child yelled as he grabbed the book I had dropped. He started ripping pages out of it, laughing all the while.  
    My eyes were tearing up as I looked up to see someone running towards me. "Hey! Leave him alone!" the person yelled.  
    "Shit! It's Gerard," I heard the kid with blonde hair say before the younger one started running. The other ran off, following the rest of their group.  
    I was still on the ground, holding my stomach in pain when Gerard ran up to me, slowly helping me up. "Hey, are you alright, Frank?" he asked, concerned.  
    I replied with a groan, laying my head on Gerard's shoulder. The hold he had on me was strong, like someone was hurting his posession and he couldn't stand it. He looked around to make sure all of the kids were gone before he picked up my books and started leading me to his house. He carried me all the way to his home and didn't let me go until I was laying on a bed. By the time we got there, the throbbing in my ribs had eased up a little and I could breathe without much pain. "Thank you, mr. Way," I said, struggling to get the words out.  
    "Haha! It's Gerard," he replied, laughing cheerfully before bending down to kiss my forehead. "I would do _anything_ for you," he whispered.

  


* * *

 I woke up to the feeling of Michael kissing my cheek. "What?" I yawned.  
    "Our guests are about to leave," he said as he pulled away.  
    I must have slept for a long time. Was sleep the only thing I enjoyed anymore?  
    We went to say goodbye to the travelers and I kept my head down the entire time, only bothering to shake Raymond's hand. I said a quick farewell to both of them as they hurried out the door. Madam Way had an appointment with the town doctor and was being driven away by horse and carriage shortly after.  
    "So, are you going to tell me why you were in the bushes the other day?" Michael asked.  
    I smiled, thinking about the dream I had. Michael cleared his throat, making me return my attention to his question. "It's nice. I don't know how to explain it. I guess I'll show you."  
    "Come on then, let me see it," he said, urging me to move.  
    I let a giggle escape me as I smiled shyly. I started to run through the back door of our home, hearing Michael complain about not wanting to run, but when I looked behind me, he was following. Once I turned the last corner, I saw the spot I wanted. I jumped in it before Michael could see where I went. He slowed down on the turn to catch his breathe, bending over slightly to let the air flow better. "Frank!" he shouted.  
    I waited until he walked by me before I jumped out and grabbed him, pulling him back into the bush, causing us to fall hard onto the ground. "What the hell, Frank?" Michael said, laughing. But before I could answer, he was pressing his lips to mine.  
    I lifted my hand and grabbed the back of his neck and pulled him forward to deepend the kiss. I opened my mouth and he licked my bottom lip, sending a shiver down my spine. Once again, we stayed together for the day, just enoying each other. It felt nice to have someone close again, someone what was just like Gerard.  
    A few hours later, we heard the horses ride up to the house, so we knew Madam Way was back. We went inside, wondering how the appointment went for her. We sat down at the table in our usual spots. Madam Way's bright smile wasn't there when she greeted us. It was replaced by an expression of sadness and fear. Michael must have noticed his mother's change in her usually exuberant mood. "What's wrong, mother?"  
    She sat in front of us, looking at us both with sad eyes. "Well, the doctor said that I'm sick. They don't know what it is, but I'm-I'm going to die," she choked.  
    My eyes were wide in shock. I turned to look at Michael; he was holding back tears, his hands were in fits, his knuckles white as a ghost. I was so close to crying it hurt. Madam Way was like a mother to me. The closest to one I've ever had.  
    Michael slammed his fists on the table before jerking up, pushign the chair with a loud screech, and running out of the room. I yelled at him to stop before getting up and hugging Madam Way, quickly whispering that her son would be alright. I ran to his room, trying to get through the door before he could lock it.  
    Just before he could close it, I pushed the door back open and hugged him tightly. "It's going to be okay, Michael."  
    "No! It's not okay! It's never going to be okay! Gerard's gone and now my mother is going to di-"  
    "Stop!" I cut him off, causing him to stare at me with wide, watery eyes. "Stop it! I lost Gerard, too, you know. And Madam Way is a mother to me and I love her, but I can't lose you too! I won't lose you." I said, looking him in the eyes. His eyes were red and there was a river of tears flowing from them.  
    He was quiet for a moment before hugging me back so tightly I could barely breathe. He pulled back from the hug, but one of his hands was on my cheek and he locked eyes with me. "I love you," he said in the most drowning voice I'd ever heard.  
    I just kissed him. I couldn't say that I loved him back. Because I didn't. I loved Gerard and it hurt because I knew that I was hurting both of them.  
   

* * *

 As the days went by, Madam way got worse and was on her deathbed in no less than a month. Her funeral was today. We sent a message to Gerard. I was going to send the letter that I basically had memorized by now. I've written it so many times, but I never had the heart to send it to him. It wasn't even that big of a deal. It was just a note...right? But I still didn't want him reading it. Michael didn't cry at the funeral. He had to be strong for the both of us because I was such a horrid mess.  
    I haven't been sleeping lately. Things seem to be getting worse.


	6. Words I Thought I'd Never Speak

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I see you lying next to me  
> With words I thought I'd never speak

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This Week's Chapter Is Based On The Song- "Famous Last Words" by My Chemical Romance
> 
> Credit to MikeyFudgingWay (tumblr) for writing the fic (I only beta'd and added small parts)

Several days later, Michael and I were sitting in the library when a servant came in with a letter from Lord Way saying that Michael was to be wed in thirty days or less or he would lose everything in the Way name.  
    From then on, everything was hectic. Women from all over the world were coming to stay at our house; some as beautiful as the places they came from, some who looked like they were from inbred families. Michael wasn't very happy that his father kept sending them, and when they would arrive, he would go to his room to hide and only talk when absolutely necessary.  
    Weeks have gone by and Michael has still not chosen a wife. He's been more distant than I've ever seen him. Two days. That's all we have before everything is lost. Just two more days.

  


* * *

Michael and I were walking through the garden when I noticed that there were fish swimming around in the fountain. "Michael, did you do this?" I asked as I ran up to the fountain to see. He didn't give me an answer. I was looking at the new fish when I heard Michael cough to get my attention.  
    When I turned around, I found him on one knee, arms holding out a small black box. He was looking at it as if he lost track of it, the world would end. "Will you m-marry me?" he asked in a shakey voice. I didn't respond. I had no idea of what to say. There was a long silence before Michael sighed and stood up. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked. I know that you love Gerard and-"  
    "Yes. I'll marry you," I said, still unsure of what I was saying.  
    He smiled wildly and ran to me, grabbing me around my waist and kissing me passionately. "I love you," he mumbled. Those words. I. Love. You. Those three words I hadn't even thought of since Gerard left. The very three words I was sure I wouldn't ever mutter again until my love returned. Instead of faking any kind of love, I simply smiled and kisses Michael back, hiding behind actions.  
    Michael told his father about our engagement immediately and our wedding was to be in only three days. Members of Michael's family were coming to the mansion every hour. Distant relatives I'd never met before were constantly wandering around the house like they owned the place.  
    I stayed in my room as much as possible; I wasn't one for social interaction. It was only a day before the wedding and I could see the decorations being hung near the entrance of the garden. It was simply amazing; the roses cut fresh, the chairs in perfect alignment of the aisle I was supposed to walk down. The suspense was driving me insane.  
    I went to sleep that night feeling unsure of everything in my life. The one thing I hate about sleep is that it makes the morning come faster.  
    I was woken up very early the next morning and was instantly pushed into a tuxedo beefore I even got the chance to clear my vision. I felt sick to the very core of my being. I wondered how Michael felt, what he was thinking after just losing his mother, how he felt about Gerard not being able to attend the wedding. Most of all, I wondered where Gerard was, if he was alright, if he was still fighting. I wondered if Madam Way was watching her youngest son get married, or if she was watching over her eldest son in battle. I was pulled from my thoughts by a knock on the door. I wasn't very surprised to see Michael walking in.  
    "What are you doing here? You know you're not supposed to see me," I said.  
    "I know, I know. I just had to see you before we do this," Michael explained, gesturing towards the window that looked over the garden.  
    "Why?"  
    Michael sighed heavily and looked to the ground. "Are you sure you want to do this?"  
    "Michael, if I didn't, I would have never yes in the first place," I assured him.  
    He looked at me for a second before nodding slowly. I closed the distance between us in one swift movement and kissed him like I wasn't sure if I would live to see another day. After a moment, he pulled away and smiled in a way that reminded me of his mother. With that, he walked out the door, a more confident bounce in his step.

  


* * *

Sooner than I could imagine, I was standing at the end of aisle, waiting for the music to start so I could make my way down to Michael. The entire wedding was a blue of 'I do's' and quick, close-mouthed kisses. The reception was nearly over when I heard a knock at the front door. I excused myself from a group of older women fawning over 'how much I've grown,' and made my way to the foyer.  
    When I opened the door, two war messengers were standing on the porch. "Hello," I greeted coldly.  
    "Hello, sir. Is this the Way household?"  
    "Yes, it is. May I ask why you're here?" I could barely breathe. There was only one reason two men in uniform came to your house. The taller of the two frowned and handed me a small yellow note. "I-is th-this?" I couldn't get my words out right. I struggled to hold back tears.  
    The man who handed me the note nodded stiffly before they both turned and walked away. I closed the door with a bang that sounded like a gunshot and everything went silent around me. I fell to my knees slowly as I unfolded the yellow note. It felt like water was rushing through my ears. I felt like I was drowning. It felt like everyone was gone except me nd that fucking note. I was numb. I opened it and read the faded black ink. 'Gerard Arthur Way; MIA until further notice.'  
    I instantly began to sob. I shoved the note into my pocket and stood up and ran to my room. "Frank!" Michael yelled as I ran past him. "Frank, what's going on? What happened?" He ran after me, but I locked the door before he could get inside.  
    I heard him banging at the door, telling me to open it. I sat at my desk and began to rewrite the note. The same note that I was too cowardly to send. I still didn't know why I couldn't pluck up the courage to mail it; it held no importance except my love for Gerard. I decided that I was going to send it this time.  
    Once I finished, I looked at what I had written. The writing was sloppy and the paper was stained with my tears. I ignored how terrible it looked and folded it, sealing it in an envelope.  
    When I finally opened my door, I found a very confused looking Michael staring at me. I pushed past him and ran down the stairs and out the front door, rushing towards the war messengers. They looked at me strangely as I handed the shorter one the note. He only nodded understandingly before shoving the note in his pocket and getting on his horse.  
    I pulled the yellow paper our of my pocket as Michael caught up to me. He saw the note in my hand before he wrapped me in a rib-crushing hug. "It's going to be okay, Frank," he whispered.  
    "No...No, Michael. He's gone. Gerard's g-gone," I chocked out, no longer caring if I cried.  
    "But we have each other, Frank," Michael said as he loosened his grip on me.  
    "I love you," I blurted out against his chest.  
    "What?" he asked like he couldn't believe what he'd just heard.  
    "I fucking love you, Michael!" I yelled against his chest, hating to have to repeat it.


	7. Ritorna-Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ritorna me.  
> Cara mia, ti amo.  
> Solo tu, solo tu, solo tu.  
> Solo tu, mi amor.  
> \---  
> (Return to me.  
> I love you, my dear.  
> Only you, only you, only you.  
> Only you, my love)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This Week's Chapter Is Based On The Song- "Return To Me" by Dean Martin
> 
> Credit to MikeyFudgingWay (tumblr) for writing the fic (I only beta'd and added small parts)

After the wedding, I don't think there was a moment that Michael and I were apart. Our honeymoon was at the Way's country manor. During the carriage ride, I sat on Michael's lap, giving him a quick kiss before whispering, "It's just the two of us now," in his ear.  
    "I know," he groaned, resting his head on my shoulder.  
    After that, most of the trip was quiet. We were both in our own deep thoughts, too preoccupied to talk to one another.  
    Around nightfall, Michael and I were laying in bed in the master room of the house, a small fire lit to keep us warm. Michael had his arms wrapped around me and my head was on his chest, watching it rise and fall slowly with each breath. He kissed the top of my head before scooting down and pushing me under him, not waiting for me to respond. He stuck his arm under my back, pushing me up to meet his lips. He attacked my mouth with his tongue, tasting all of me. I let a ragged moan escape my throat as Michael went to unbutton my shirt before kissing my jawline and nipping at my collarbone.  
    Then, I grabbed Michael's hand and rolled on top of him before reaching down and capturing his mouth, claiming it my own. I lifted up and pushed my hand under Michael's shirt, gaining an unassured look from him. "This is our honeymoon, let me pleasure you first," I muttered before licking from his jawbone to his ear, biting it softly, earning a small groan from Michael.  
    I pushed off his shirt before beginning to suck on his collarbone. Scratchy moans were coming out of Michael's mouth, making me harder than I already was. I began grinding against his leg instintively, desperate for some friction. I kissed down Michael's chest before taking his nipple into my mouth, biting it gently as I played with the other one. I slowly made my way down Michael's chest, living open-mouthed kisses as I went, until I reached his groin. I rubbed the bulge in his pants before unbuttoning them and pushing them down and taking them completely off.  
    Michael had an arm covering his eyes, his mouth open, his lips shining. Fucking beautiful. I breathed hot air on his dick and heard his breathing stagger. I smiled before spitting on the tip of his cock and taking it into my mouth. "Ahh, your...fuck, Frank!" Michael moaned as he grabbed onto my shoulders. I slowly took the rest of him in, feeling his length hit the back of my throat.  
    I slid Michael's cock out and twirled my tongue around the tip, tasting the pre-cum. I felt him push his hips up and start to fuck my mouth. I gagged at first, but let him continue, only using my tongue to rub what parts of his dick I could reach.  
    As Michael continued, I unbuttoned the rest of my shirt and discarded all my clothes on the floor. "Get on your knees," Michael commanded.  
    I nodded and moved from between his legs to the top of the bed and rested on my hands and knees. I heard Michael spit before I felt a finger being pushed into my hole. "Ahh, fuck," I groaned, reaching down to stroke my cock. He pushed in and out a few times before adding another finger and scissoring me open. "Come on, I'm ready," I moaned, feeling impatient.  
    I felt him pull his fingers out before he flipped me over on my back. I stared up at him as he spit into his hand before stroking my cock to full hardness as he slowly pushed inside of me. I let out a big gasp as he reached down and began biting on my neck as he pulled out halfway only to slam back into me in one swift motion, making me moan like a whore. His thrusting became fast with every movement.  
    We were soon coated in our own sweat, kissing, gasping into each other's mouths. I reached down and started to stroke my dick with my hand, my other arm wrapped around Michael's neck, keeping him close. His hands were around my back, making me arch up into my own fist. I soon came hard, shouting Michael's name at the top of my lungs. My vision went blurry and I felt Michael tense up before coming inside of me.  
    After it was all done, we were both smiling like idiots, breathing hard, drenched in sweat. Michael pulled out of my and grabbed his shirt from the ground to clean us both off. We pushed the covers over us and Michael quickly fell asleep with his arms around me. I stayed awake a little longer than him, thinking of the letter I wrote to Gerard, knowing every word by memory.

 

* * *

  
_Dear Gerard,_   
_I miss you so very much. I haven't stopped thinking about you since you left. I miss being at your side. I miss your kisses, your hugs, your smile. I miss everything about you._   
_I hope you're safe... I keep thinking of you, darling, wishing you could be here with me. I wish this silly war was over so you could come home, but things don't look too bright at the moment. I have never been so lonely as I am right now. I'm completely lost with you. I pray that you can come home soon so we can live a sane and normal life together._   
_I'm not much a poet, but I've written this a thousand times over in my mind, it's helped me through all of this;_   
_Return to me, for my dear, I'm so lonely. Hurry back, oh, my love, hurry home, I'm yours. Return to me, for my heart wants you only. Hurry back, hurry home, to my arms, to my lips, and my heart._   
_Just remember, I'd end my days with you in a hail of bullets._   
_Truly yours forever,_   
_Frank_   


  


* * *

Before I knew it, our honeymoon was over and Michael and I were riding back to our house. "Do you think he's dead?" I asked.  
    Michael sighed heavily and shook his head. "Frank, we've been over this. You saw the note yourself."  
    "Yes, but it just said he's missing in action," I argued.  
    "Frank, please, my love. You can't keep doing this to yourself," he pleaded, kissing the top of my head.  
    "I know, I'm sorry."  
    "I love you," Michael cooed.  
    "I love you too," I replied half-heartedly.  
    The ride home went by fairly quick. It helped clear my head from too much clutter. I've learned to love Michael, and as hard as it is, I'm letting Gerard go one small step at a time.  
    As we pulled up to the front steps, I looked over at Michael, who was staring out the window. His expression held nothing but fear and regret. I looked around him, at the front of the house, trying to catch a glimpose of what he was seeing. I froze. I couldn't speak. I couldn't even breathe. I did nothing but stare at the person at the edge of the path leading to the front door. This couldn't be happening.


	8. Your Eyes Vacant And Stained

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And should I be shocked now by the last thing you said?  
> Before I pull this trigger,  
> Your eyes vacant and stained.  
> And in saying you loved me,  
> Made things harder at best.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This Week's Chapter Is Based On The Song- "Early Sunsets Over Monroeville" by My Chemical Romance  
> Credit to MikeyFudgingWay (tumblr) for writing the fic (I only beta'd and added small parts)

               Gerard. It was Gerard standing at the edge of the path, unhurt, not even a cut or a bruise in sight. Nothing. His face was full of hurt and betrayal, but his eyes were as vacant as they were before he left. I looked over to Michael with a questioning look. He shook his head before kissing me on the forehead and telling me to stay where I was as he walked out of the carriage and up to Gerard, leaving me behind in disbelief.

               I couldn't believe it. My heart was almost done being stitched back together and now it was in a million pieces all over the floor. The two brothers were so close by; I could hear what was being said.

               "I come home to find my mother six feet underground and my brother married to the man I love! I came to an empty house to be told you'd gone off on your fucking honeymoon!" Gerard yelled, enraged.  His voice sounded hurt, yet strong. It sounded different from what I could remember. His words used to come out so sweet and soothing; the kind of voice you'd want to listen to read a book on a rainy day. I was watching them from the small window on the side of the carriage, so close, yet so cut off. "I should have never left! I knew you would take him from me!" Gerard spat at Michael, who was standing there, looking down at his feet, taking in everything his brother was saying to him.

               "You should have seen him, Gerard. He wouldn't leave his room. He would leave his door open at night thinking you'd show up!" Michael argued.

               "That doesn't mean you had the right to take him from me!" Gerard growled before hitting Michael hard enough to send him crashing to the ground. I gasped and threw a hand over my mouth in shock. Gerard looked up and we locked eyes through the window. He walked around Michael, who was holding his face in his hands, not bothering to protest to Gerard coming towards me.

               Gerard opened the carriage door and sat beside me. I hadn't realized I was crying until he leaned forward and wiped away one of my tears with his thumb and keeping his hand on my cheek. I instinctively leaned into his touch and closed my eyes, crying even more, breathing in his scent. "You didn't wait for me," Gerard sighed, breaking the silence that had fallen between us.

               "What was I supposed to do? I didn't even know if you still...still loved me," I said, my head now resting on his shoulder.

               "What would make you think I didn't love you? I've loved you since we were schoolboys! Since the day I brought you home to live with us! Even before you told me everything about-"

               "But you didn't kiss me back," I interrupted. Gerard lifted my head up and looked at me with a confused expression. "The day you left you didn't even look at me. What was I supposed to think? Michael was there for me when you weren't. Michael kissed back when you didn't He looked after me when you couldn't."

               Gerard pushed me down and climbed on top of me before grabbing my wrists and pitting them above my head. He locked eyes with me again. I could drown in his eyes, I swear. "I love you, Frank Anthony Iero," he said sternly.

               "It's Way now," I whispered.

               He gave me a sad smile before tilting his head and kissing me. It felt like Heaven to have his lips on mine again.

               "Gerard?" I asked, breaking the kiss after several moments.

               "Yes, my love?" he cooed.

               "Whenever I kissed Michael, it reminded me of you...I'm so, so-"

               "Don't ever say that again!" he growled, hellfire suddenly burning in his eyes.

               "But, Gerard-"

               He tightened the grip on my wrist and painfully grabbed my chin with his free hand. "No, Franklin. Don't ever mention Michael again or say that he reminded you of me!" he shouted, now very angry.

               "Please don't call me Franklin," I pleaded.

               "Why? Are you afraid your father's going to come back and call you that? Take you back home with him?" Gerard sneered.

               "Why would you say that?!" I screamed in his face.

               "Because it's true, isn't it?" he mocked.

               "Yes, but why would you say anything about it?!" I shouted. "I told you everything that happened because I trusted you! I trusted that you would never use it against me because we loved each other," I said, ending my sentence in nearly a whisper.

               "Do you still love me?" Gerard questioned, still enraged.

               "Yes, of course I do!" I yelled, unable to look at him.

               It was quiet; only Gerard's rough breathing keeping us from complete silence. "Well, I guess that's unfortunate," he said, letting go of my wrists and pushing off of me before leaving the carriage.

               I got up and chased after him, only to be pushed down onto the rocky ground, my hands catching my fall, leaving them bloody and littered with cuts.

               He hurried away, leaving me to my down self-destruction. After I stopped crying, I got up and ran as fast as I could. I ran past the house and into the woods, not caring when my feet led me. I was small and clumsy, so I didn't get very far before losing my balance on a stop sticking from the ground, sending me headfirst into a tree. I collapsed on the cold, hard forest floor before I was out cold, all of my thoughts becoming black and meaningless.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please review!


	9. A Lonely Lifetime

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who knows how long I've loved you?  
> You know I love you still.  
> Will I wait a lonely lifetime?  
> If you want me to, I will.
> 
> For if I ever saw you,  
> I didn't catch your name.  
> But it never really mattered,  
> I will always feel the same.
> 
> Love you forever and forever.  
> Love you with all my heart.  
> Love you whenever we're together.  
> Love you when we're apart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This Week's Chapter Is Based On The Song- "I Will" by The Beatles  
> Credit to MikeyFudgingWay (tumblr) for writing the fic (I only beta'd and added small parts)

               _I was in the garden, minding my own business and enjoying the world around me when I noticed someone was watching me. I turned and saw Gerard hiding himself by a bush with his journal out, his hand flying with his charcoal over the paper like he was born to do it._

_"Oh, hello, Gerard," I said, smiling as the words came out of my mouth. Gerard's head shot up from the drawing and he smiled at me. My heart skipped a beat when he smiled in return. He looked down and started to work again. "What are you drawing?" I asked him, my curiosity winning me over._

_"I'll show you in a second," he mumbled, not sitting on a concrete bench in the corner. I started moving towards him, but he stopped me. "No, wait! Don't move! I need you there," he said, motioning with his free hand for me to back up to where I was before._

_"Okay, whatever you say," I laughed. I rolled my eyes before going back to where I had been standing. It was quiet while Gerard worked. The wind was blowing cool air onto my face and making the water in the fountain ripple beautifully._

_Minutes had gone by and Gerard had finally stopped moving. "I'm done," he breathed._

_I waked over to him and sat down. He pulled the drawing to his chest protectively. "Are you going to show it to me?" I asked._

_He gave me a skeptical look. "Are you sure you won't laugh?"_

_"Why would I laugh at something you made?" I asked, reaching over to snag the sketchbook out of his hands. I turned it over to find what he'd been drawing. "Oh, my God. Gerard, this is...it's amazing," I gasped, lightly brushing my fingers over the artwork. It was a portrait of me standing over the fountain, looking down at the fish. Everything was detailed from the sky to the bushes behind me._

_"Do you really think so?" Gerard questioned, not quite believing me._

_"Yes! Can I keep it?" I asked, shyly looking up at Gerard for the first time since I've seen the picture. He bit his lip and looked very uncertain. "It's okay if you want to keep it," I said after a moment of silence._

_Gerard didn't reply. He just looked up at me before licking his lips and reaching for the back of my neck. He pulled me into him, connecting our lips. This is the first time we've ever kissed. My eyes opened wide when I realized what was going on before slowly closing them and enjoying Gerard's mouth._

_After our lips were red and swollen from kissing, I pulled back. "So, does this mean I can keep your drawing?" I asked, my eyes hazed from the euphoric feeling passing through me._

_He laughed before looking me in the eyes and leaning forward. "Yes, you can keep it," he whispered before kissing me again._

* * *

               I woke up and looked around slowly. I had no idea where I was. I lifted my head up to see better, but I couldn't hold the weight. My body was shivering uncontrollably against the hard, wet dirt ground. My head was throbbing and I was too weak to stand. I sat in the dark for a while before beginning to remember what had happened. I felt so stupid. Why did I run? It felt like I was drifting off again when I heard a faint noise in the distance. It got louder and louder, so I opened my eyes and saw a small light. "Frank! Where are you, goddammit?!" a voice yelled.

               It was  too far away for me to make out whose voice it was. I tried to yell, "I'm here!" but the words came out rough and strained. I tried yelling a second time, again, the words only coming out in gasps.   

               "Frank!" Gerard screamed in frustration. I could finally hear his voice.

               "I'm here," I squeaked.

               Gerard must have heard me because the light turned in my direction and I heard the sound of feet pounding against the dirt. Seconds later, he ran up to me and kneeled by my side. I probably looked smaller than I was since I was curled up by a tree, shivering from the cold. "Frank!" Gerard yelled with less anger in his voice. I let out a cry and looked at him with fear before darkness took over me again.

 

* * *

**(Three Days Later)**

               When I woke up, I was in my bed, covered in a million blankets. I could see a fire burning in a corner of the room. My head was pounding and I felt dizzy as I tried to sit up. I instantly fell back down, my head hitting the large pillow with a _flop!_

I looked out the window to see the sun setting. The curtains were drawn back so I could see the grounds. I turned towards my other side and saw Gerard asleep in a chair, a book falling from his grip. His feet were tucked under his legs and his head had fallen to the side. "Gerard?" I said, my voice low, my throat feeling raw. "Gerard?" I said again when I saw him stir in his sleep.

               I really didn't want to wake him, but it was hot under all the blankets and it felt like I was covered in old sweat. Gerard opened his eyes slowly before shooting up and hurrying to sit beside me on the bed. "Frank, are you okay? How are you feeling? I'm so sorry. So, so sorry, Frank. I was just mad and I don't know what I was saying. You're my world, Frank. I was scared to death when I couldn't find you. I love you so much, Frank. You have no idea how much. You're so stupid! Why did you run into the woods? In winter? You could have died, Frank! You could have died!" Gerard said, never once stopping for a breath. He scrambled to make his words sound worried, mad, and forgiving all at once.

               He grabbed my hand and rested it on his cheek before bending down and wrapping his arms around my neck. "I'm sorry," I mumbled into his jacket

 

* * *

               I stayed in bed for another two days, still feeling under the weather. The town doctor said I was lucky to survive and that most people would've succumbed to hypothermia and died within the first couple of hours.

               Once I was on my feet again, I went to talk to Michael to see how he was. I was leaving the library to go to his room when Gerard stopped me. "Are you not going to stay and read with me?" he asked.

               "I need to see how Michael is doing," I told him, looking down at my feet.

               "He hasn't left his room since I came back. I don't know what he's doing in there...just be careful," Gerard sighed.

               I nodded quickly and walked up the stairs and to Michael's door. I opened it to find him in a corner of his bed, the blankets covering his legs. The room reeked of alcohol and there were empty bottles of wine shattered around the room.

               When I walked in, Michael looked up and I could see how terrible he looked. His eyes were red and puffy from crying and he was in the same clothes he had worn the last time I saw him. "What do you want?" he asked, sounding defeated.

               "I'm sorr-"

               "No! Don't give me that shit!" Michael yelled as he got up from the corner he was sitting in and started walking towards me.

               "Michael, I didn't know he was still alive," I explained.

               "Shut up!" he screamed before pushing me down and starting to punch me in the chest.

               "Michael!" I yelled, grabbing his hands and holding them behind his back, forcing him down.

               "I hate you!" he screamed into my chest, crying hysterically. After a few moments, his cries became silent. "Frank, I'm sorry. I love you so much. I'm so, so sorry. I didn't think he would come back," he said, trying to stop his tears.

               "I'm sorry, too, Michael. But you have to know that I've loved Gerard since before I even knew what love was," I explained, pushing Michael off of me. I helped him to his bed before pulling the covers over his body and gently kissing his forehead.

               "I know that Gerard always had your heart for keeps," Michael mumbled. I started to get up, but he grabbed my hand, stopping me. "But just know that you'll always have mine," he whispered before closing his eyes and falling asleep.


	10. What Did Your Daddy Do?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> His dog day's just begun.  
> Now everybody is on the run.  
> Tell me now it's untrue.  
> What did his daddy do?  
> He jacked a little bitty baby.  
> The man has got to be insane.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This Week's Chapter Is Based On The Song- "Janie's Got A Gun" by Aerosmith  
> Credit to MikeyFudgingWay (tumblr) for writing the fic (I only beta'd and added small parts)

               Awkward. That was the only word I could use to describe the next morning. Michael, Gerard, and I sitting together, the tension extremely thick between us all. I wouldn't really call it "having breakfast" because no one was eating anything. Gerard was still ill of guilt from what he did. Michael was upset and kept stabbing at his food like it was evil and ready to try to rip off his head at any moment. I sighed and waited until that sorry excuse of a breakfast was over.

               After we cleaned up, I went to the gardens like I do on any regular day and I saw Michael turn the corner and go down another path lined by bushes that made a kind of maze. I decided to follow him, whether he liked it or not. He ended up in the hole in the bushes that we would spend days in together. I accidentally startled him when I said his name.

               “Oh hello frank I didn’t see you,” he said, a shy smile finding its way to his lips.

               “I was following you,” I admitted, blushing slightly. He moved over so I had room to lay down beside him. “Did I ever tell you why I don’t like being called Franklin?” I asked. He looked at me and shook his head. I laughed to myself a little and padded my eyes, thinking about when I was a kid, before I came to live with the Way family. It was terrible. ”Well, my mother died when I was very young. I can’t even remember what she looked like. I just remember my father changing after she died. He became cruel and all the love in his heart died with my mother. He would say that he hated me, that he wished I was the one dead, and he became the town drunk with his stupid bastard son. When he would hit me he would always yell, 'Franklin, you ruined this family! Franklin, this is your fault! Franklin! Franklin! Franklin!' And whenever someone says that fucking name, it reminds me of him and I hate it!” I was yelling into Michael’s chest, trying to slow my breathing. He had his arms around me, hugging me tightly.

               “I'm so sorry, Frank. I never knew. I would have never called you that. I just…I’m sorry.” He sighed and leaned his chin on top of my head.

               Once I calmed down, I sat upright to get a better look a Michael. “Do you know why I'm telling you this?" I asked.

               “No, “Michael said.

               “It’s because you still mean a lot to me, Michael. I still love you,” I admitted as I reached in my pocket, taking out a small, heart-shaped locket “Your mother gave me this before she died. She told me what would happen after died. She knew that you would ask me for my hand. The one side is a picture of me and her. I think it’s rightfully yours,” I said, putting the small metal object into Michaels hand and closing it. I looked up to see Michael smiling. It was a genuine smile, it was real. One like he use to have when he was younger. I smiled just as wide back and kissed his forehead. "You know, you've got a hollow point smile. It takes my breath away every time I see it."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was short, I'm sorry.


	11. In My Life, I Love You More

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> But of all these friends and lovers  
> There is no one compares with you  
> And these memories lose their meaning  
> When I think of love as something new  
> Though I know I'll never lose affection  
> For people and things that went before  
> I know I'll often stop and think about them  
> In my life I love you more

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This Week's Chapter Is Based On The Song- "In My Life" by The Beatles
> 
> Credit to MikeyFudgingWay (tumblr) for writing the fic (I only beta'd and added small parts)

               Michael and I were walking back to the house when I saw Gerard looking out of a window on one of the upper floors. He looked furious. I gave him a questioning turn of my head in return, but he only spun on his heel and walked away from view.

               As soon as we entered the house, Gerard came bounding down the stairs, a fire burning in his eyes. "I thought I said to stay away from him!" he yelled as he grabbed Michael by the collar, shoving him forcefully against the wall.

               I stood in shock for a moment, not able to process what was happening. What had set Gerard off? He was so calm when we left and now he didn't even seem like the same person.

               "Gerard, we were just talking! Nothing happened!" I yelled, only to be ignored.

               "You fucking bastard! You always take things that are mine! Ever since we were little, if I loved something, you'd rip it right out of my hands!" Gerard screamed before punching Michael in the jaw.

               Michael let out a small yelp before responding, "Fuck you, brother! I only ever took something from you when you dropped it on the floor and left it there to break!"

               Gerard started throwing punches at his brother as I struggled to pull them apart. The next thing I knew, I was on the ground, Michael having lost control.

               "I never let him fall to the floor, Michael! You did not have the right to just come by and take him! I only let him go because I was forced to," Gerard growled.

               "No one forces a child to let go of his toys," Michael spat back.

               "I'm not a child! I've been through more horrors than you could even imagine!" Gerard hissed.

               "That makes you even more of a child because you can't admit that you left Frank! Forced or not!"

               "I know I left Frank. I know I did and it wasn't by choice! But I still love him and I'll do anything in my power to get back what was once mine," Gerard swore being pushing off of Michael and storming into the other room.

               "I..." I tried to apologize, but I couldn't find the words. I just shook my head and dusted myself off before walking to the library to escape. I had ready just about every book that lined the shelves but I didn't care. I just needed some words, some sort of story to wander off to. I picked up the oldest looking book I could find and laid on a couch that was against a large window.

               The sky had gotten considerably dark and it looked as if it was going to rain. _'A perfect day to read,'_ I thought to myself as I looked out the window. I had read at least several chapters before I heard a light knock at the library door.

               "May I come in?" Gerard's voice asked.

               I gave a slight nob before moving to slip my feet under me, giving Gerard room to sit. I patted the spot next to me and he smiled and took the invitation. After a long moment of silence, I decided to break the ice. "Why do such small things make you angry, Gerard?"

               "I don't know. I just don't like to think about what happened when I was gone," Gerard sighed. "Do you...do you love him?"

               I was a little shocked by the question, but, Gerard _did_ have the right to know. "Yes," I answered after a long silence. "I do love him, Gerard and nothing's going to change that."

               He looked out the window, his heart hurting at the words I was saying. He didn't say anything as he stood up to take his leave.

               "Wait, Gerard! I never finished," I pleaded, grabbing at his arm to make him sit again. "Gerard, if you think for one second that I would choose him over you, you're dead wrong. You're my first love and my last. In my life, there's no one I could ever love more," I cooed before moving over to place a small kiss onto his lips.

               He immediately wrapped his arms around me and I fell to his chest. I laid there, listening to his heartbeat. It was steady and calming; it reminded me of the Gerard I knew before he went to war.

               "Who is that?" Gerard suddenly asked.

               "Hmm? Who?" I lifted my head to see who Gerard was talking about. He was looking out the window, so I followed his gaze to a carriage in the front of the house.

               Robert was stepping out from the buggy. I gasped in shock. Why was he back? What did he want from me? Gerard must have noticed the strained expression on my face because he immediately became worried.

               "Frank? Who is he?"

               "I have to go tell Michael," I whispered before getting up and running towards his room. I opened the door and ran up to him, panicked. "He's back, Michael! What am I going to do?" I cried.

               "Who's back? Who?!" Michael asked, concern flooding his face.

               "Robert," I hissed.


	12. A Stain That Never Comes Off

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This Week's Chapter Is Based On The Song- "I Never Told You What I Do For A Living" by My Chemical Romance  
> Credit to MikeyFudgingWay (tumblr) for writing the fic (I only beta'd and added small parts)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another knife in my hands.  
> A stain that never comes off the sheets  
> Clean me off. I'm so dirty babe.  
> The kind of dirty where the water never cleans off the clothes.  
> I keep a book of the names and those  
> Only go so far 'til you bury them  
> So deep and down we go  
> \---  
> And we'll love again, we'll laugh again,  
> We'll cry again and we'll dance again.  
> And it's better off this way.  
> So much better off this way.  
> I can't clean the blood off the sheets in my bed.
> 
> And never again, and never again.  
> They gave us two shots to the back of the head.  
> And we're all dead now.

               Michael looked at me in disbelief, his eyes wide. Moments later, there was a loud yell that came from the bottom floor. Michael and I both snapped our heads towards the source of the noise before giving each other one last, worried glance before running to see what was happening.

               When I got downstairs, Raymond, Robert, and Gerard were in the foyer, all looking very tense. Robert was on the ground, holding his jaw. Gerard stood above him with a raised fist. Raymond stood near the door, looking extremely confused.

               "Raymond, what happened?" Michael asked.

               "I don-"

               "Don't you ever fucking say that again!" Gerard shouted before kicking Robert in the gut, earning a low yelp from the man.

               "What did he say?" Michael asked Gerard as he walked over towards Raymond.

               "That's none of your concern," Gerard growled as he glared at his brother. "Come here, Frank."

               I looked down at the mention of my name and nodded lightly before stepping forward. Gerard immediately grabbed my hand and took me to the library before shutting the door behind us. Everything was silent except for the rippling sound of rain hitting the glass windows. Gerard was staring at me with an indescribable expression.

               My back was pressed against the closed wooden doors and my eyes were fixed on the ground. Gerard was so close to me that I could feel the heat of his body radiating against mine.

               "Why didn't you tell me?" Gerard asked in a hushed tone.

               "Tell you what?" I said, looking up at Gerard with unwanted tears forming in my eyes.

               Gerard's expression turned serious, his gaze sharper than broken glass. "About Robert," he growled.

               "I didn't want to hurt you more than I already have. I never meant...I never meant for any of this to happen," I sighed.

               It was quiet for a moment before Gerard wrapped his arms around me tightly. "You are the greatest thing that will ever and has ever happened to me. I want to know everything that happened while I was gone. I fell in love with you that day I picked you up and carried you home. Do you remember that?" he asked, leaning back to look at my face.

               I wiped the tears from my eyes and smiled weakly. "I love you," I whispered before sobbing into his shirt.

               "I'll never stop loving you," Gerard cooed. "I understand you were lost without me here. I forgive you for everything that happened with Michael and Robert while I was away."

               "Wait. What did Robert tell you?" I asked.

               "He said you had gone to bed with each other. He said you were lonely and in need of someone."

               "H-he lied! That's not what happened! He--" There was a knock at the door that saved me from telling him the terrible truth so I quickly turned around to open it.

               "They want to stay," Michael said from the doorway.

               I sighed heavily. "Just don't let Robert near me," I said in defeat.

               "No!" Gerard shouted.

               "We have no choice," Michael argued.

               "I don't care," Gerard said, pushing past Michael and me as he headed towards the foyer.

               Michael and I followed shortly behind and came into the scene, having missed some sort of scrap. Just as Robert was brushing himself off, Gerard grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and slung him against the wall. "Look, you son of a bitch, if you ever lie to me again or even touch Frank, I will not hesitate to kill you with my bare hands."

               Robert let out a small laugh. "Gerard, I feel like we got off on the wrong foot. Frank here was practically begging me for it. Saying things like 'I love you more than Gerard. You're so much better than he is. I'll always love you more, I promise,'" he said with a smirk.

               "What?" Gerard questioned, turning to me.

               "No," I growled. "He's lying!" I screamed as I ran up to Robert and punched him, causing his head to slam against the wall. "I was nice to you! I talked to you and enjoyed your company, but what did I get in return? Now you're trying to make it look as if I wanted it? You're going too far, you selfish bastard!"

               I started to cry again out of anger and frustration. I hated crying; it showed too much emotional pain. Everyone was just staring at me with varied looks. Gerard appeared to be sympathetic, Michael was clearly disappointed in Robert, and Raymond was beyond confusion. I was hysterical at this point and my knees suddenly gave out, making me fall to the floor. I covered my face to shield my humiliation in being so weak. Deep down, I was so enraged about everything that I couldn't hold it back any longer.

               "Frank?" Gerard cooed.

               "No! Don't...just leave me alone," I cried as I got up and went to my room.

 

* * *

               As soon as I had gotten to my room, I fell asleep. By the time I awoke, it was dark and I was alone. Once I got my bearings I got up to find Gerard. As I was walking through the dark halls, I heard a bone-chilling scream from the guest rooms. I was weary about going towards the room, but curiosity has always gotten the best of me.

               The door to Robert's room was slightly cracked open. As I neared the door, I saw thick, metallic blood everywhere around Robert's lifeless body. Gerard was standing over the bed, his back facing door, a large axe in his hands.

               My hand flew over my mouth, muffling a quiet shout as I backed away from the door. Gerard must have heard me because he immediately turned around and spotted me. Our eyes locked for a split second and I could see joy and insanity fill his. A wide, slightly tilted smile creeped its way onto Gerard's face. "Frank? Is that you?" His voice was sadistic as the words rolled off his tongue as easy as swinging an axe down on a sleeping body.

               I ran once I saw him heading towards the door. I hurried down the halls, hearing his loud, thumping steps behind me. I ducked into Michael's room to find him in pieces. His face had been peeled and ripped off before being nailed on the wall.

               I gagged at the sight. My stomach was upside down, my heart was beating out of my chest, and my brain wasn't capable of functioning anymore.

               "Frrrraaaannnnkkkkk? Did you see that I did to the people who hurt you?" Gerard sang from down the hall, his voice still the same psychotic tone.

               The rough sound of the axe dragging against the wooden floors grew louder and louder as he neared the room. I didn't want to go to Raymond's room, fearing that Gerard had already been there.

               "Don't worry, Frank. I'm going to kill all the people who hurt me too...who cheated...who didn't wait," Gerard said, his steps getting faster and faster.

               I ran to the window and climbed down the ledge, placing my feet on various altered bricks. I sprinted to the garden and went straight to the heart of it, near the fountain. I hit behind the bench because it was the only thing big enough to cover my entire body. I waited as I heard Gerard walking up the path; the scratching noise of the metal of his axe against the cobblestone sidewalks was showing signs that he was getting closer and closer to my whereabouts.

               "You know I love you, right, Frank?" he asked, walking in the other direction, away from me. "You said you'd never leave me!" He screamed as he slung his axe into the side of the fountain, causing it to break and fall as the fish flowed out with the water. He smiled and stomped on them, hopping from next to next, laughing hysterically as their guts flew across the ground.

               I let out a small cry and froze; snapping him out of his hysteria. He looked in my direction and a violent, deranged smile made its way onto his lips. "I found you, my love!" He removed the axe from the side of the fountain and began walking towards me.

               "No, no, no. Please, don't do this," I sobbed. "I love you, Gerard!" I screamed as he stood looking down at me.

               "And I love you, Frank," he cooed as he lifted up his axe and brought it down upon my head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please review!

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Videos My Chemical Romance Should've Made](https://archiveofourown.org/works/560341) by [partyghoul](https://archiveofourown.org/users/partyghoul/pseuds/partyghoul)




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